We All Fall Down…

Monday, February 22, 2021

Ring around the rosies
Stupid weather hosed me
Ashes, ashes
We all fall down

So, during our Winter Freeze-a-thon, food availability was scarce and water was nearly impossible. My “no sodas” mandate was quick to fly out the window, and I had to eat what foods I could find.

I stopped.

I stopped everything there for a while. I didn’t pay any attention to what I ate. I didn’t log anything. I didn’t abstain from sodas (or cookies or crackers or candy bars). I didn’t even take my meds most days. I didn’t take showers or brush my teeth, or some days even brush my hair. I don’t think I wore my contacts all week, and I only wore my bra once (after all, if I was going out in the bitter cold, I had on a super thick winter coat and no one could tell anyway if the girls were loose). I didn’t grade. I didn’t look at email. I didn’t alter assignments. I was shape of a rock.

I just floated. I did the minimum I could do and moved as little as possible.

I guess that’s normal, but I know I could have done better. Regardless, the old adage says something about falling down—it’s not about how many times you fall, it’s about how many times you get back up.

So here we go again. Now is the time to get back up. Now is the time to track and log and think about what I’m doing. I have updated my log in the app this morning, and not only did I include the coffee from today, I added in a category for my meds so I can list what I’m having there (and in the process found out I’d been short-changing myself on one of my mutli-vitamins; I’m supposed to take three each time, but I was only taking one. Beginning tomorrow, I’ll adjust that dosage properly.

I want to devise a habit tracker. I’ve looked into some apps, but they don’t really seem to fit what I need, so like my calendar for school, I feel I’ll have to begin from a blank page and make my own. And it is likely stupidly silly to some people, but there is something in my brain about checking things off a list… Each day, I need to include several things that I want to make sure I do with more consistency in my life:

• Take meds

• Brush teeth

• Body Spray

• Drink water

• Shower

• Take Blood Pressure (morning, after work, before bed)

• Weigh in (Friday mornings only)

Eventually, I want to add more things to that list, like walking or other exercise, maybe learning to do make-up well and doing it daily, even a daily chunk of time for reading or personal growth and development. I probably should add grading, but since it’s already top of mind from all of my jobs, I don’t know that I need the reminder. I should probably add some household things like doing laundry every other day or actually folding or hanging and putting away said laundry (have I mentioned that I hate doing laundry?).

Anyway, that last week of chaos really threw me off track. I am getting back on today, but so far it has been easy. I will go down to the cafeteria at lunch, which will be a challenge, as they often have very few salads left by the time I can get there. No matter, that is the plan. No matter how delicious that pizza looks over there!